A Very Special Day

Happy 9th Birthday

Claudia Blake

Dear Claudia,

You have brought so much JOY to my life in the past 9 years. I loved every step of watching you grow and change. You are a beautiful girl inside and out. Your heart belongs to Jesus and He shines through you in the way you treat others and your compassion for other people. You have such a caring heart! I admire you so much for so many things. I am often reminded how unworthy to be your mother I am but I am so thankful God saw what He could do through me and blessed me with you, in spite of my inadequacies. All day on the 18th I kept thinking of what I was doing 9 years ago. On October 18, 2002, I spent the entire day thinking it would be your birthday but you didn't make it until after midnight so the 19th is your big day! Yesterday (18th) I kept going back to that day in my thoughts. It was such a new experience for me but such a wonderful blessing to be a part of. I will always remember the sound of your first breath before you cried. I will always remember the song that I sang in my head to calm my fears when I was taken to surgery unexpectedly because you had flipped on me. I sang "Breath of Heaven" over and over and later, a family friend would sing that very song the day we dedicated you to our Lord. That song always takes me back to my first minutes with you. Sweet girl, I know I make mistakes in mothering but I pray that you always know I am trying to do my best and to do what the Lord wants me to. I am thankful for the relationship we have and I pray God always keeps us this close. I love spending time with you because you are an amazing person and being with you makes me better.  Lately I have been reading a mother's blog who had to bury her daughter when she was just a little girl. Every time I read, I am overcome with emotions of thankfulness that God has allowed us to borrow you from Him for this time. Your life is a precious gift from God and I am so honored to be part of your journey. I pray that you always know how much I adore you and how thankful I am to be your mommy. Happy Birthday

Love,

Mommy

P.S. In the past year you gradually stopped calling me mommy and now I am momma. I am not crazy about it but I understand the process. I miss being called mommy by my little girl.  :-)