Ready or Not, Here We Go...

I have not counted down the days, I have not waited anxiously, I have not even let myself think about this day except for in the ways I had to...just so I could have all the planning done that I needed to do. Even with all my efforts to prolong this date and make time stand still, I was unsuccessful and here it comes...May 15th.

May 15th is the day that my sweet little Claudia will graduate from Kindergarten.. Even just typing that, I could break down in tears. I'm not ready, and to be honest, she is not ready either. Oh, academically, she is ready. She is ready in every "official" way she needs to be but she is not ready to leave her teacher and she is not even willing to talk about it very much. That has been perfectly fine with me because I have not wanted to talk about it either. I cannot let myself think about all the ways she is changing and all the parts of her that are no longer. This afternoon, I took her to get her hair cut. She did something that she usually does not do anymore, she sat in my lap while we waited. She sat and let me hold her tight and kiss her A LOT and she did not complain or try to pull away! I loved it more than I can describe! I asked her if she minded and she actually said she liked it. Boy oh boy did that make my heart soar! That's my baby girl!

I want to stay up really late and try to make today last as long as I can because I'm just not ready for tomorrow. But will I ever be ready for all the tomorrows that come with raising children? I doubt it. I don't think I will ever be ready to see either of them meet all of the milestones that are ahead of us. I won't be ready because I'm just so in love with them and love being with them. I am trying so hard to treasure every moment but I'm human and life gets in the way of my desire to close my family in a little bubble.

I just have to close by giving Honor and Praise to our Lord & Savior for this wonderful year of Kindergarten. His protection and provision were evident everyday and as always, they were right on time and just what we always needed! I praise Him for her teacher and the wisdom she has. I praise Him for a teacher who cares as much about what kind of person Claudia is as she does what kind of student Claudia is. Finally, I praise Him for the honor I have of being the mother of this incredible little angel.

Okay, May 15th, here we come...ready or NOT!